I made a post this morning, that said that I felt like I'd lost a friend, and that I was tired of being the one expected to bend.

That wasn't totally accurate, or clear. Seeing as I got multiple responses, I'm just going to post one overall response.

The problem I've had has been going on for a while now, and really doesn't directly connect to the whole current argument about my character and the IRA stuff. THAT, is just the most recent argument.

My problem lies in the fact that every time we get into a disagreement, I get the textual equivalent of being yelled at. He doesn't discuss things from a perspective of give-and-take, like it should be. He tells me I'm wrong and then belittles my opinions with insults and hyperbole.

I wouldn't have a problem with 'agreeing to disagree'. I've done that many times with others. Its being ATTACKED that hurts.

I don't like being browbeaten, and i don't like effectively being called stupid simply because my opinions don't coincide. and that's what I'm getting. NOT a discussion, but someone using rapidly-typed rants to wear my position down.

If this isn't what is happening, I'd love a rational explaination why I can have an argument and lose with other people and not come away with the sensation of being punched in the stomach. Having a strong opinion is one thing; defending that position by verbally beating the hell out of someone who is supposed to be a friend is quite another.

To those who've offered help- thank you. I really do want to solve this... I'm just at a loss as to how. This isn't a recent problem, but rather one that has been eating at me for some time.

To those who made comments about how I act sometimes... You're right. I have a hard time backing down. That much IS my fault. Its a flaw that grew from the days where it felt like I was never right, even when I could prove it. I do work on it... Obviously not as successfully as I'd like.

If someone disagrees with me, no problem. My reaction of leaving an argument with one last comment is my way, however unsuccessful, of trying to escape from a situation I find untenable. I should find a better way to break off. I realise, unfortunately belatedly, that it looks more like me trying to get in the last word- It isn't... But I see that it certainly doesn't come across that way. For that, I AM sorry.

As a final note... All I want is for the nastiness to stop. I really won't mind him disagreeing with me. I just don't like being raked over the coals.

I'm trying to keep this as neutral as I can; thus I'm leaving out names.

Had two friends act... I don't know how to describe it. 'In a less than positive fashion' is about as diplomatic as I can put it. I'll not name names, they'll know what I mean, I think. This was online. Both became rather rabid when a certain (I would have thought neutral) subject came up; one left the discussion after firing off, saying that they'd get pissed off about it. I don't know if he realizes that he was being insulting and somewhat mean or not.

The other seemed to pick up where the other left off, being very negative. And given the subject is one close to my heart, it kinda hurt. I don't even understand why he'd be so angry and opposed to it...

Honestly, I think that it was out of line. Especially the tone both used. I think of both STILL as friends... But I don't understand this behavior at all. And I'm not even sure why I'm posting this.

To those involved, those I refer to or the witnesses- if you reply, do it anonymously- I don't want anyone getting hollered at or upset beyond what's happened. I'd like to know why tho.